Waiting, and its impact on bloggingw

Over the last 2 months, I have been very busy. But do you know what I have not been very busy with? Getting pregnant.

We did have our first appointment at the end of june, which I mentioned in my last post (2 months ago! whoops!). Then I had a tube test (to check that my tubes were open), and then we had one more talking appointment. Oh, and we had a counseling session.  But It does feel like nothing is happening sometimes, which is part of why I haven’t been blogging…the other part is that I’m lazy but what can you do.

Ok! In order of appearance:

The First Appointment

Dun dun dun. This was the first time we actually got to talk to a fertility specialist, and…well…it was fairly anticlimactic. Of all the reasons I haven’t written over the last two months, my disappointment with this appointment was probably the biggest.

We each took a half day off work to go, because the appointment was in the middle of the day. We had all those questions written up, at least twenty. And we turned up 20 minutes early, just in case.

The waiting room in the fertility clinic at the hospital is quite different from most of the rest of my experience with the NHS. It’s quite bright in a non-fluorescent lights kind of way, airy and with quite nice receptionists, and even a water filter with cold water. We had to fill out another form, and once again I was really happy to see that they had a section for B to fill out that was for ‘partners’ that offered her a M or F  to circle.

When I went to hand in the forms I apologized to the receiptionist because I didn’t know the street number for our GP practice, only the street name.

“You should see what information I get from other people!” she said. “This is absolutely fine.”

When we got called in by the doctor, things got less…happy-making.

First, his accent was very difficult to understand. That wouldn’t be a problem if he was aware of it/trying to make sure we understood what he said, but he was most decidedly not.

Second, there was a nurse in their with them, and for the vast majority of the 30 minute appointment (I know how long it was because he kept telling us we only had 30 minutes and absolutely no more time than that, and implied that  if we didn’t get everything done we wouldn’t be able to move onto the next stage appointment) he talked to her rather than us. The only thing he addressed to me were questions. Do you have regular periods. How long is your cycle. You’re 30 correct? (all stuff I’d already put down on the form he was looking at)  Then he would make some unintelligible comment to the nurse. But mostly, he just wrote information into paperwork in his files. He barely looked at us the entire time.

He didn’t give us time to ask questions, and when we tried to force some in, he often didn’t really respond to them.  He gave us a date of December for when we could start trying to conceive  (this was June!) and when I asked if that was for IVF or IUI, he said it didn’t matter. This made me quite upset as I’d been under the impression that with IVF there would be a waiting list but with IUI it could start as soon as all tests were completed. He brushed off my follow up questions about this. And he said that the next appointment would be in november, to get the drugs for the december try. I’m sitting there, in June, thinking, seriously? They’re not going to see us until NOVEMBER! That was what really made me upset.

The one good thing about him was that we then did an internal scan of my ovaries, and he was very careful when I explained that I find smear tests really painful. In fact the internal scan didn’t hurt at all (though I was dripping jelly for about 24 hours). It did discover that I had polycystic ovaries, but he of course explained nothing about what that meant or how it might impact my chances of conceiving. He gave me a form for a tube test, said I should call them on the first day of my next period to schedule it. Then it was out the door.

Back to the very nice receptionist, who scheduled our appointments. She tried to help us as best she could and set up appointments for early november/december. But then she said when is your next appointment supposed to be? At which point the doctor popped back out of the consulting room and said we should have an appointment in the meantime and then popped away again, leaving the nice receptionist to find out when my next period was, and when then my tubes test would be, and set up an appointment at least 3 weeks later to give the results time to come in.

Bad, annoying doctor. not a great experience by any means.


Ok stay tuned for the next installment of the summer recap – Counseling.





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